Obsessive Compulsive Searching

   I wonder how often we get caught up in Obsessive Compulsive Searching.  Meaning, are we doing things out of the habit of searching for more, grasping for something extra or the need to maintain a certain air or recognition.

   It has occurred to me that in the past, a good portion of my self image has been based on what I can do, accomplish or obtain.  When I was worked for the dealerships, there was a lot of self confidence necessary to be  one of the top sales people.  Acting the part, if you wish.

   Strangely, there are those rare souls that seem to be able to do what is needed without the need to be recognized, to receive compensation forwhat is done or as the Tao Te Ching puts it, "to create without possessing."

   As a species it seems that we are programmed to always be searching or striving for something.  I am not saying that it is all bad.  I do wonder if we don't miss the mark in striving for striving's sake.  Are we trying to "find" ourselves in accomplishment?  Self image seems to be a very powerful thing, especially if you feel you need to understand who or what you are to define "self".

   I have been listening again to one of my favorite CD sets from Eckhart Tolle, Findhorn Retreat.  He talks about accepting the stillness that already is within us.  That it cannot be "found", it's there already, we just can't perceive it because of the noise of thinking.  Makes sense.  One of the noises we may have to deal with is the need to strive, accomplish, acquire or be something more than we are already.

   Perhaps that is why I have less inclination to strive for "things" vs just evolving (although this is something I still have to deal with regularly).  As with my last entry.  It's not being lazy, it's living easy, not being in contention with life it'self.

   The creation of real enduring value is my purpose, my personal mission statement.  With this in mind, then perhaps this explains why I am so focused on perspective, doing and being instead of labels and accomplishments.  No title has ever rewarded me with peace, no check has given me love.

   I have no clue where I heard it however it has stuck with me.  "Compassion is the ability to see oneself in others."

   This perspective, this statement feels like it could easily disarm the need to justify oneself, the need to pursue endless searching for "something."  I am not saying there is error in doing, achieving or accomplishing.  I am suggesting that real meaning and rewards come not in what we do, they come in why we do what we do.

   May we feel at ease in our own skin this day.  May we put others at ease with who they are by accepting them as they are without judgement or preconception of who they should be.  To let others be as they are, perhaps they will find joy of being as well.

Peace and stillness to you and yours.

Billy B