I had a customer come in with a concern, it was obvious that he was not in a very good mood. I was as polite and professional with him as I possibly could be, he had to leave his vehicle so that we could attend to it. Later as I followed up with him to inform him when it would be done and that we were taking care of it, he was still very rude. I would say that he was rude and insulting as he made everything feel like a personal attack. I was still polite however, in my frustration after a few minutes I directed a subtle jab back at him so that, in my mind, I was putting him in his place. Boy! Did I get a response! His response was over the top and he flew into a rage, called the powers that be and made life just generally difficult for me for several hours.
The lesson here is DON'T TAKE THINGS PERSONAL! Yes, I allowed him to get to me and worse yet, by being anything but neutral, I allowed him to mess with my day on a whole different level. Just imagine how much easier it would have been to keep my simple little comment, no matter how politely stated or subtle I thought it was to myself and never let it become personal for just those few seconds.
It's not personal. Whatever his issue or challenge that day. It was his, I was in the wrong in several ways. First, I let him effect me. I took it personal. Second, I allowed my self to feed the flames of his bad humor. Lastly, I allowed myself to get involved instead of keeping my professional wits about me.
In life, sometimes the best rule is to keep our own peace, and rest in it no matter what the storms around us. This is perhaps the best way to be a pillar to those who need us most. Agreed this gentleman was probably looking for someone to go off on. The problem, it should not have been me and it was my fault that it happened the way it did. My bad, time to learn, move on and not let it happen again.
What do you do to keep the peace within you from being disturbed by others? How do you maintain presence when others are truly caught up in their story and drama?
My desire for each of you is that you have a Marvelous Day! One where the love and peace that is you, is present and untouched by the disrupted souls of others.
Peace, love and a truly GREAT DAY to you.
Billy B
HEY MATEY,
ReplyDeleteONCE AGAIN A TRULY BEAUTIFULLY WORDED POST. :)
I HAVE POSTED AN AWARD FOR YOU OVER ON MY PAGE, IF YOU HAVE CHANCE HOP OVER AND COLLECT. :)
EVE.X
I've had that happen to me before and you are so right, we should keep our tramps shut while that kind of person is around. Once they leave we can blog about it make ourselves feel better, lol ;)
ReplyDeleteThanks Billy a great reminder not to step into another persons mess. 'No one can take your peace, you have to give it away.'
ReplyDeleteI don't always keep the peace. Unfortunately, I have a bad temper, BUT, I have learned a thing or two when I worked in IT.
ReplyDeleteMore and more I find myself thinking about the person who is rude or having a bad day. I tell myself, "I don't know what's going on in their life. They could have lost someone recently. Divorced. Lost their job. I don't know. What I do know, is they could use a smile?" So sometimes I find myself offering them a hello with a smile. Normally when people know they matter, they wind up calming down and smilling back.
Have a wonderful evening.
(((((((hugs)))))))
ReplyDeleteThank you folks for reading and commenting. I appreciate it more than you know. ;D
ReplyDeleteI just finished reading a book that answers your question. It basically explains the difference between treating other people like objects (I-it) or like individuals who matter (I-You). The guy you described was deep in an I-it way of being, and so were you when you responded to him. It's called self-denial. The book is Bonds That Make Us Free by C. Terry Warner. I highly recommend it.
ReplyDeleteI will definitely check out that book! Thank you. ;D
ReplyDeleteHi WillyBcool, sorry to hear about your bad day.
ReplyDeleteTake it easy and be cool.
I had encounter such situation too and sad to said it's always from my own husband. His working pressure and anger, he tends to throw it on me.
Well, I'd learn to eat humble pie and not fight back in order to have peace in the house. Anyway our marriage still survive after 27 years no doubt it's not a bed or roses.
I'm a person who is always full of grace so not keeping petty thing in my heart. But over the years he'd learn to cool down a lot and take thing easy. Guess it's my influence who always think positive and look on the brighter side.
Oh sorry, if I talk too much. Have a nice day.