A worthwhile ramble.

   Controlling the urges, wants and fascinations of our lives can, for some, be the greatest challenge of them all.  I am ADD and can be OCD.  This means that I can become transfixed by and idea and obsess over that idea until it gives up it's secrets.  This by the way is what makes our scientists in large part so good at what they do.  They fall in love with ideas or questions or topics or whatever and obsess over them until those things start to give up their secrets.  By so doing, they give us the benefits of their efforts and passion to know or to understand.  This is not the outlet that I am talking about.

   About twenty years ago, I had a job where there was a certain amount of time whenever the weather got bad that we had to ourselves.  My friend that worked there and I would create paper airplanes and see who could get them to fly the farthest or fastest, etc.  With very little time, we had paper airplanes that far exceeded what we could have imagined.  We probably could have competed on a collegiate level should such a competition been available to us.  Not that this really benefited us.

   What if the fascination was with something or someone and in an unhealthy or unproductive area.  Because of the growing numbers of ADD (not enough room here or appropriate to go into the why's here) I can see how so many stalkers are appearing.  I have however had moments that my curiosity was peeked and I would take off on a mission to understand or learn about something that had no potential gains or usefulness in my life.  Like the time I wanted to learn how to make foam cutters.  This was inspired by a hobby I had with radio controlled gliders at the time.  Never used what I learned more than a couple of times, never will again, probably.  Useful, no.  Interesting, yeah, kind of.  50+ hours wasted, maybe.  However, what if I could apply the efforts of my curiosity towards my mission, my purpose, the cause that I now understand to be so much a part of my life?  (Hindsight, I know.)  Where would I be now?  How much good could I do if I got started and moved forward as I had in other instances now?  Of course, life can be a bit complicated as you get older.  Family and responsibilities can limit what can be done now versus youth and the energy I had then. Yet, I wonder.  Am I really limited where as to where I can't?  Is my belief in my mission and purpose strong enough to cast off the shackles of fear of failure to make the foray?  I wander if the wisdom of age isn't more of a rational fear?

   What would you set out to do if you knew you could not fail?  Would it be noble?  More to ask myself than others.  What would I do, now in my mid 40's, if I knew I could not fail?

   What is your dream?  What does the wisdom of age keep you from doing?  What fear do you have that keeps you from going after life changing or world changing goals?

   I will suggest that you are worthy of such causes and efforts.  Did you know that there is greater honor in trying and falling short than never daring?  "Tis far greater to aim for the stars and land on the mountain tops than to aim for a dung heap and hit your mark."  True Chinese proverb.

   Vision, purpose and passion to you.  I look forward to hearing your thoughts on my ramblings.

Billy B